Being Bad at Something is Good

Over the past few years, I’ve been nurturing a child of mine. No, this is not a human child. This is a story that is as close to my heart as a child must be. I must nurture it, grow it, see it mature. I must guide it into becoming something wonderful that makes the world better. That is a bit like a child, no?

But I often told myself that I wasn’t ready yet for such a great thing. I wasn’t good enough. My vocabulary wasn’t able to captivate my imagination. My characters weren’t fleshed out enough yet. My world needed more content. I needed more experience and skill. I felt my skills weren’t good enough. My dialogues were insufficient. My ability to capture emotion in characters was short-sighted. My story didn’t make sense. I did things wrong that ‘experts’ said one should not do when writing. I simply was not good enough in so many ways.

Then comes the obvious truth however. One can not become good at such an art without trying. If one never starts writing, one will never become good. I’ve considered writing something else first, to hone my skills, but I decided that a different story would not be as close to my heart. If I do not believe in it and love it and yearn for it, then how can I write it? That is when my thoughts started changing.

There was also the thought of later. I can’t start now because I’m studying. I have enough to do for school. I can’t spend my time writing. That thought too, makes no sense. Writing is a joy (or it always was to me) so why would I not use it to diffuse the stress from studying? It would create a balance and keep me happy. It’s never too soon nor too late to start writing. Today is as good as any day.

My writing style will become more flowing as I progress. My vocabulary might not be abundant but if I use it wisely, I can make anything sound classy. Being aware of mistakes that experts point out is the first step to internalizing the correct way. So that are all these ‘not good enoughs’ truly? They are lessons to be learned from so to become better at this craft.

I know my lessons are obvious ones. Write now and not later. Write what you believe in. Write if you want to write. Write something terrible so you can become better next time. Sheer determination and desire is pulling me through at this point.

I’m sorry that this post is a bit short and a bit obvious too. There is not much structure to it either but perhaps it helps another writer regain their faith in themselves. If I can believe, then they can too. Just keep on writing, fellow humans, and also look forward to that book series that may one day come out where the author line says Tristin R. F. Worth!

May destiny be kind to you.

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